I can’t do this. What if I messed this up? There’s no way I’m good enough for that.
Do these thoughts sound familiar? Each of these thoughts reflects self-doubt, something we all experience from time to time. Today, I’m going to be talking about self-doubt. I’ll go over what self-doubt is along with five ways to combat it.
What is Self-Doubt
Self-doubt is exactly what it sounds like. It’s a lack of confidence in yourself or in your own abilities. Self-doubt can actually be quite healthy in certain circumstances. Sometimes, we do need a critical eye to get a realistic perspective of a situation.
However, self-doubt can also become toxic. It can hold you back in fear, preventing you from taking opportunities that are right in front of you. This may sound familiar to some of you. It certainly is familiar to me. I know for sure that I have missed out on opportunities due to self-doubt.
Five Ways to Combat Self-Doubt
Due to its ability to hold us back in fear, self-doubt needs to be balanced and we need to learn to trust ourselves. By trusting ourselves we are more open to opportunities that come our way.
Be Aware of your Thoughts and Self-Doubt
The first way to combat self-doubt is to know about it. For some of us, self-doubt has become part of our inner dialogue so it can be tough to become aware of our self-doubting thoughts. However, try to recognize the self-doubt you tell yourself. When you hear yourself doubting, kindly tell yourself to stop. Being aware of your thoughts is truly half the battle.
Once you become aware of your self-doubts, you can question them. If you say things like, “I can’t do this.” Ask yourself why you can’t do it. What stands in the way of you doing what you want to do? What proof do you have that you can’t do it? By asking these questions, you realistically look at the obstacle or opportunity in front of you with fresh eyes away from self-doubt.
Learn to Trust Yourself Through Journaling
Sometimes, due to poor decisions we’ve made or perhaps lack of confidence, we no longer trust ourselves. This causes us to doubt many decisions that we make. So to begin trusting yourself again, consider journaling. You learn a lot about yourself by journaling and you become more aware of your thoughts, patterns, and actions. By writing down what’s going on in your head and in your life, you can view it all from a different perspective.
Write down positive things that have happened to you as well as things that you’re proud of. Talk about what personality traits you like about yourself. As you continue to journal, you may find that your confidence and your trust in yourself grows.
Talk to Someone Close to You About Your Self-Doubt
Everyone has self-doubts and it can be extremely liberating to tell someone else your own. You may even find that it’s a bonding experience as you share self-doubts that you have with each other. Talk with someone you’re close to about what you’ve been feeling. You may find that they feel similar ways and you may hear about ways they combat their own self-doubts. Not to mention, if you’re talking to a close family member a friend, they often shower you with positive comments which is a wonderful confidence boost.
Learn From Your Setbacks
Self-doubt can often come from mistakes and setbacks. Setbacks and failures are difficult to deal with, there’s no doubt about it. However, just because there has been a setback or a failure, does not make you a failure and it does not mean it’s guaranteed to happen again. However, many of us become extremely cautious in our decision-making, wondering constantly if we’re making the right decision.
If you feel like this relates to you, think of the setback or failure that has caused you to begin to doubt yourself. What can you learn from that setback while you’re moving forward? If you can learn from your mistakes, you’ll be less likely to make the same ones in the future.
Once you’ve taken a lesson or two or three from your setback, that setback is no longer worthless. It has made you a better and stronger person. With this new knowledge, you have more possibilities and opportunities open to you. Setbacks are never fun to deal with, but pushing past them and learning from them can be priceless.
Practice and Learn Skills to Increase Your Confidence
Sometimes self-doubt stems from a particular skill that we feel we’re not good at. For example, if you’re doubting yourself as a public speaker and feel as if this is holding you back, then maybe it’s time to begin honing your public speaking skills. Look into taking a few classes into public speaking or try out public speaking in a few small ways. Even if it is just making a joke in the office among a few people.
By practicing and learning the skill that’s causing self-doubt, you’ll find that the self-doubt will begin to vanish slowly away. It may not go away completely and maybe you won’t be completely comfortable with public speaking, but you’ll definitely be good at it and you know it won’t hold you back anymore. That’s an extremely valuable feeling. Fear can hold us back so much that we owe it to ourselves to do what we can to overcome fear and live the best lives we can.
Whenever our confidence is shaken and we begin to doubt ourselves, we can always go back to this list and give ourselves a fresh start. Self-doubt can trap us and fear and can hold us back. Self-doubt can cause anxiety and depression and is simply no good for mental health. So try out these five steps to combat yourself down today.